Welcome to MY Nightmare

Ya know, there once was a time in my life where it was truly carefree. I really enjoyed those days. I miss those days. Terribly.

Thursday night was a hectic night. I realized, too late, that I had nothing prepared for dinner. Can you imagine that Jane? Something like dinner never gets pushed to the wayside here. It's my house everyone straps on the good ole feedbag.

Well, I forgot and just decided, oh what the heck. Let's order pizza. You'd have thought I promised diamonds to every female on the planet. Only my crew are guys and it was like I'd given them a lifetime subscription of Playboy or something. The evening progressed and we had a good ole family time.

Friday morning, I wake up a wonderful 9:50 in the morning. Still not reallly sure how I managed that.

What's the first thing you do when you wake up? Well, the first thing I do is go pee. Pop the light on, drop the drawers and have a seat. Looking at my thighs I was like OMG........WTH????? GREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

My thighs were covered in a rash. I pulled up my tee shirt sleeve and before my eyes the rash was growing down to my hands, up my shoulders, down my back and in all the nooks and crannies of a middle aged woman's body. THIS IS SO CRUEL!!!!!! Then the itching started. My first thought was CRAP. This is so not fair. I'm allergic to something I ate. I ingested something to cause this widespread rash. Because I've resolved to not use the "f" bomb anymore, I didn't curse at all. What's the point if you can't use the best descriptive word ever?

I decided to go to the doc after I almost convinced myself to treat myself with the usual Benadryl and stuff. I couldn't go all weekend with this itching. Doc gave me usual rundown. What did you have to eat last night? Pizza. I'm not allergic to pizza. New detergents? New soap? New brand of prescription? No, no, no and no. "Drop your drawers...." Shot in the right butt cheek. Greg was watching and said, "Dang, that's a big needle". Thanks for pointing that out since I'm on the receiving end of it.

This little side show demolished my plans for the day. I wanted to completely clean out our bedroom and start on the closet in Michael's bedroom. Instead, on the way home from the doc, we stopped for a bite to eat and to Walmart for a few things we needed. By the time we were leaving the Walmart parking lot, I told Greg to take me home. I became weak and lethargic. I wanted to sleep and nothing else.

We had Greg's kids this weekend and I needed to muster enough strength to get dinner on the table before they got here. That meant I needed a serious power nap. Thank God I had the forethought last night to prepare the roast and get it in the crock pot.

I got up from the nap and proceeded with the evening. We had a good time with visits from the neighbors practically all night. They didn't want to stay, they had to leave, but kept coming back! In or out! Sit or leave! I finally just left the garage door up for them. It was less work than going to the front door.

Saturday dawned and it was a nice day. We all slept in and rubbed the sleepy dust from our eyes at about 10:00. It was a 2fer for me sleeping in. Two days in a row. The Gods were smiling upon me. It was great.

Saturday evening dinner was meatball subs with my homemade sauce. I let the sauce simmer all day long. (Yes, this story is heading somewhere.) The gang was sniffing it all day and drooling by dinner time. It was great. I don't particularly care for meatball subs, but these smelled so ridiculously good that I had to have one. Not Greg's favorite, either, but he jumped in with both feet. Almost literally.

The kids had to leave by 7. The weekend was over with them. The evening wound down nicely and we were content.

Sunday morning, my alarm DOES NOT go off for the first time in my life. I thought I had it set for 6. I thought gee, it seems late. Looked at the clock and it was 7:06. An hour and 6 minutes late!!!!!!!!! Well Crap!!!!!! I'm relieving Dingleberry. God was no longer smiling upon me.

Go to the bathroom to pee...........I'M COVERED IN ANOTHER FREAKING RASH. Head to toe. The itching was tremendous. I was about the put a gun to my head. It was so late in the morning that I couldn't call my supervisor and say I wasn't coming in. This so totally sucked. I showered and didn't even bother to blow dry my hair and was out the door with the Benadryl in my hand. Every 4 hours and it was like I was takin a placebo. Nothing was working.

I had hives like I've never ever seen or had in my entire life. I was cursing under my breath all day long. Any idea how long an 8 hour shift is when you can't even sit down because you itch so bad?

I managed to make it to Monday morning. Went to my doc's office at 07:30 for their urgent care clinic they offer before regular hours. As luck would have it, it was my doc doing the urgent care. He wasn't going to give me a shot. He was going to just give me a script for prednisone and and anti-itch pill. I plead with him. I begged him. Please give me a shot. He asked if anyone drove me there. I told him no, but I swear to God that I would drive right home. It's a 7 minute drive when you're itching. Normally a 20 minute drive during morning traffic. I didn't mention the 20 minute part. He gave me a shot. THANK GOD!!!!!!!!! I came home AFTER I had my other scripts filled and went back to bed. I slept until 15:30. I was so weak and lethargic. The rash was still there but the hives and itching abated.

I woke up this morning with no rash. No hives. And no energy. I could barely get my feet over the side of the bed to go pee. I called my supervisor and told him there was no way it was going to happen today, either. I'd see him tomorrow. I took a nap from 13:45 to 16:00 today. Soundest sleep I've had in a week.

Since the only common denominator between Thursday and Saturday night is pizza and meatball subs, we've all determined I'm allergic to tomatoes. I've always had a slight allergy to them, but not enough to keep me away from them 100%. This time it's cured my tempting fate. I won't taunt fate ever again where tomatoes are concerned. I promise. I swear. I respect the holy fruit. I bow down to the big TOMATO.